…you think a short man in a yellow rain slicker and hard hat is waving at you from afar, and upon closer inspection, it turns out to be …. this.

This didn’t happen to me. I was diagnosed with nearsightedness when I was ten years old, and not so myopic that I thought a fire hydrant was a guy waving at me through the fog. Although if I take out my contacts today, I’d probably ask the lamp post for directions to the bus stop.

This actually happened to one of my college roommates, who swore up and down this friendly hydrant was waving at her until she walked closer and reality hit.

I also had a college room mate who tried to lose weight by jogging around campus in a large Hefty bag so she could optimize her sweat, thus shedding the pounds.  Today, she is still a dear friend.